Rock bands and movies don’t have a very good track record, Just think back to the KISS movie from the late 70’s. But The Finnish Rock band Lordi are a little different. The band members all dress as monsters and have pretty elaborate stage shows.
Director Pete Riski and Mr. Lordi himself came up with a story involving an autistic girl whose father, concerned for her health after a cat scan incident, wants to remove her from the hospital. However the 2 along with the security guard, a vagrant, doctor, and the obligatory whiny business man, all get stuck in the elevator. When the doors open they find themselves in an abandoned hospital. What follows is your typical by the numbers horror flick with each member of the group being picked off one by one as they traverse the floors in an attempt to exit the hospital.
Each floor of the hospital features a member of Lordi as the tormentor. Luckily none of them actually speak, they just scream and attack the group. The story does some cool things with time in the film and the director does a decent job of making things creepy. However the acting is pretty horrendous. The film is shot in English for some reason and whether the actors are unaccustomed to English or are just terrible is hard to know. It doesn’t help that these are character you’ve seen in countless other horror films. The security guard that tries to rationalize the situation and be the hero. The caring father who only wants to get his kid out of the hospital. The concerned and hot female doctor, and of course the arrogant businessman who is only concerned with his own safety. You don’t really care about any of them since they’re all 2 dimensional empty characters.
Despite that the film does have atmosphere and decent visuals. The Lordi characters are pretty scary in their own right and do a pretty good job here of playing the stalkers. However the movie completly cops out with a really lame ending that explains nothing and pretty much feels like it was another of those “how do we end this thing” moments where the easist way out was chosen.
I suppose if your a fan of Lordi or cheesy by the numbers horror films then this is up your alley but you’ll find nothing deeper than an average haunted house movie here.
3.5 out of 10
